i cannot move – September 11, 2001

I wrote this right after September 11, 2001.  It isn’t good, nor well written, but it was my thoughts, and my memories of that day that came flooding out of me.

i cannot move – September 11, 2001

the bodies flew
and landed with a sound
that i could not hear.
the sound of screams.
the sound of fear.
the sound of terror.
my neck hurts from looking
i am glued to my spot on the
i cannot move.
i cannot move.

i hear the sound of sirens.
i see the trucks go by.
i see people coming at me.
i watch them as they walk.
they move as if they are statues
slow, hard movement.
i cannot move
i cannot move

there is a sound that is not
a sound.  It is a roar.
it crashes into me
it moves through my body
it slides around me
my ears hurt.
i cannot move
i cannot move

a man tells me ‘it’s comming down’
i do not understand.
it cannot come down
they are forever
they are my city
they are twins
but part of a whole
i cannot move
i cannot move

i see a cloud moving
towards me.  it rushes.
it hurries.
it is coming at me fast
and my legs begin
to carry me away
but not fast enough
not fast enough
it is black and there
is no air.  it is gone.
i cannot move
i cannot move

i cover my mouth with my shirt
i feel a hand on my back
and the arm attached to it
grabs me and holds me
and i hold back.
we lay on the ground
for hours, only minutes
we stand and keep holding
on.. our life is each others

we run.  my shoe is gone
we run.  he stumbles.
we run and run and run
i hear screaming
it is my screams
the air is not as thick
i look at the man
i’ve been running with
he is screaming too

we stop and hold on to each
other and cry and cry
we are safe
we cry
we hold on to each other
and walk and walk
we walk forever
i can move
i am safe

we go our
separate ways and
walk away from each other
i do not know him.
but he has my tears
and i have his.

i look around at the
i cannot move
i cannot move.
i cannot run from memory.
i cannot move.

Michelle, September 14, 2001

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